This will blow your socks off, so you better hold on to them. Ready?

DISCLAIMER: What follows is a total off-the-wall idea so please don't view it as some kind of an ultimate truth because it isn't. Nothing I say is. Quite the contrary. Everything I say is a big fat lie. I hope you have learned this lesson by now. 

Still with me? Excellent. Let's hop on this ruckus wagon.

READERS TEND TO GIVE 5-STAR REVIEWS TO WRITERS THEY KNOW.

Or they think they do.

You don't need to start shouting at me yet. Chill. Let me explain my hypothesis. 

I've been watching my book reviews with an unhealthy fascination. Okay, maybe not very unhealthy, but definitely obsessive. You know, every morning, "Oh, let me check my book reviews!" and "Yes, got another 5-star one!" and "Wow, got another 4-star one!" and "Shit, got a 2-star one, but it's the only one, so fuck yeah, I'm doing something right!"