BLOODY SANTA vs ZOMBIE SIREN. Chapter 10.

by Ksenia Anske


This is it! Last Chapter of our chain story by 10 different writers. Read about how it started here.

Please welcome our 10th author, Danielle Tauscher (aka @writer_danielle). Danielle says that she is: "Writer. Coffee drinker. Master of the shin-kick. I write about dead things & kissing, but not kissing dead things." Danielle wrote a collection of short stories PEOPLE LIKE ME & Other Stories.

Photo by Steven Depolo

BLOODY SANTA vs ZOMBIE SIREN. Chapter 10 by Danielle Tauscher

“Santa? How are you alive?” Edwin asked, not believing his own eyes. Santa shouldn’t have survived the sirens. No one could. Not even the red goblin.

This ruined everything.

Well, except for the part where he saved Edwin’s life, that is.

The red goblin chuckled. “You think I couldn’t handle a few horny women? Please. I’m Santa Claus.”

Santa dropped Edwin in the snow. It might’ve hurt had he not already been in pain due to the nasty gash in his Achilles heal.

“Now for you, Edwin The Original,” Santa scoffed, “You’ve been very naughty. What should I do with you?”

Edwin didn’t like the look in Santa’s black eyes or how the flesh fell from his bones.

“I know the Sirens’ secrets, sir. I will be useful in defeating them, my Lord,” Edwin said, trying to sound calm and strong, but failing miserably.

Why would he want to defeat the sirens? Santa had always been into the kinkier side of things; a little flesh eating made him vulnerable yet powerful. With Liara and her girls he needn’t hide himself. He quite enjoyed relinquishing his authority for a few moments in Liara’s grip and mouth. Despite her frosty exterior, Santa knew her inner warmth. He didn’t need this little elf’s secrets.

“’Sir’. ‘My Lord’—pulling out the big guns, aren’t you, now? It won’t help you. Not this time,” Santa said.

“Santa—“

Santa held up his hand to quiet the elf.  He squatted next to Edwin. His face, mere inches from Edwin’s, so that when he spoke Edwin felt his spit on his cheek. “Tell me why you did it? Why did you kill her?” Santa whispered.

“I didn’t. You saved me,” Edwin said, confused. Surely those sirens ate part of Santa’s brain, Edwin thought. 

Santa abruptly stood up and with his boot kicked the elf in the stomach. “Not that siren bitch. Why did you kill Mrs. Claus?” Santa asked. For good measure, he kicked Edwin twice more in his stomach. “No lying, Edwin. I know when you’ve been naughty,” Santa said, winking.

“I don’t—“ Edwin started. What could he say?

Edwin’s body screamed at him to run, but he couldn’t. He couldn’t stand, let alone run away from Santa. And where would he run if he could? Santa knew the truth. And this Santa—this disgusting human—was more powerful than all the Santas that came before him. Something wasn’t right.

Edwin took a chance and went with the truth. Either way, he was dead. “I needed you to destroy the other originals.”

“Why?”

“To gain their power,” Edwin said. It was the only way he would have been able to eventually kill Santa and take over the kingdom.

“But I could have killed you, too,” Santa said. “How did you know I wouldn’t?”

“I was your favorite,” Edwin said.

Santa was quiet for a moment. When he spoke it was a whisper, “indeed.”

Edwin choked on his words. “Am I… are you going… kill me now?”

“Not I. I can’t possibly kill my favorite original elf.” Santa wickedly smiled. “But them,” he motioned to the tribe of sirens slinking up behind him, “they can.”

Santa turned toward the women and spoke. “Ladies. Dinner is served.”

The sirens circled Edwin. His eyes darted from one to another and back at Santa.

“But I don’t understand,” Edwin said.

“Of course not, you ungrateful fool. You dare think you, a pathetic little elf, could destroy the king? What a fool, you are, Edwin. This is what happens to those who cross me,” Santa said. “I’m bored with you.”

“Please, don’t do this,” Edwin begged.

“Already done. Ladies. Eat,” Santa said. He turned from Edwin as the sirens began to pull his flesh from his bones. Santa heard Edwin’s bones snap and the slurping of his blood. He smiled. This was his favorite part.

Santa stopped next to Liara who stood away from the vile scene. Her eyes gleamed in the grayness of the night.  Santa wrapped his arm around her waist. “It’s time to come home, Mrs. Claus, you’ve had your fun.”

P.S.: This is the last and 10th Chapter of BLOODY SANTA vs ZOMBIE SIREN. Here are links to previous Chapters: Chapter 1,Chapter 2Chapter 3Chapter 4Chapter 5Chapter 6Chapter 7, Chapter 8, and Chapter 9.

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BLOODY SANTA vs ZOMBIE SIREN. Chapter 9.

by Ksenia Anske


One last Chapter left to publish!!! Our chain story ends tomorrow. Read about how it started here.

Please welcome our 9th author, Corey Seeley (aka @coreyalex), a young writer, a proud vegetarian, also a grumpy jerk without having three cups of coffee daily.

Photo by Ulf Rasmussen

BLOODY SANTA vs ZOMBIE SIREN. Chapter 9 by Corey Seeley

“I’m, I’m an original… you can’t kill me.”

Liara walked over to him, slowly, seductively. She thought to herself, how is an elf from the original crew still living? She knew just how odd this very situation was, and it made her all the more hungry for him.

“What makes you think I’m not going to devour you this very second?” She said to him as her eyes gazed at his mutilated corpse.

“Because, you don’t remember me, do you, my dear?”

The corpse is gone. Liara is startled; she looks behind her, all around her, but there is nothing. She hears whispers; wind blows softly around her.

“I’m an original elf, the only one left… I’m special…”

Laughter suddenly fills her heart. A laughter that annoys her in a way she never thought was possible.

Liara storms out of her lair, looking everywhere, but can’t seem to get a grasp at what's happening. She quickly becomes very angry.

“WHAT ARE YOU?!”

The whispers begin again.

“Don’t you remember the classic tale, oh Liara? Old Saint Nick used to be a jolly good man, with magic and happiness, until my crew accidently pushed Mrs. Claus out of that three-story window. Oops? He lashed out and killed my entire crew. Except for me, he left me to die on this god-forsaken island. But, what Santa doesn’t know, is I took an entire case of his magic with me. I’m untouchable, you stupid whore!”

“Come out from where you’re hiding, Edwin. Why don’t we finish this, right now? You and me.”

Liara was not scared, not in the least bit. She knows how strong and powerful she is. She actually craved his meat more than ever now that Edwin has put up a good fight. Most of the elves she had eaten were poor, weak, clueless little men who satisfied her hunger needs, but wearied her with how easy they were to kill.

Edwin wasn’t even close by; he was on his way back to the cave to spook the rest of the flesh-eating creatures that Liara had left to finish Santa. He knows Santa was done with, but he wanted to witness the end for himself. He has plans to take over his throne, to be the new leader of his entire kingdom, but first, he had to find a way to get rid of all of these sirens that craved elven flesh so much.

As he reached the cave, he steps inside, quietly. He hears that bloody tone again. He knows it’s the Yuletide song. They’re trying to seduce him, lure him into their trap. It will not work, not again. He continues to tip toe deeper into the darkness, and the song continues. It gets louder, and more controlling. He knows he must step away. He must prepare for the worst to come. It’s so tempting…

“Come here, Edwin…”

“Come closer, you’re the one we’ve been yearning for...”

Edwin is about to step away, when Liara comes from behind him. She throws herself at his short, weak little legs. She bites at his Achilles heal. Blood splatters to the snow.

“Nooooo...”

Edwin moans in agony.

He squirms away from her bite. He can barley walk. Suddenly, someone grabs him and darts from the cave. Edwin looks up to see who’s carrying him away.

“Santa?”

P.S.: This is 9th Chapter of BLOODY SANTA vs ZOMBIE SIREN. Here are links to previous Chapters: Chapter 1,Chapter 2Chapter 3Chapter 4Chapter 5Chapter 6, Chapter 7, and Chapter 8.

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BLOODY SANTA vs ZOMBIE SIREN. Chapter 8.

by Ksenia Anske


2 Chapters left to publish! Our chain story is coming to an end. Read about how it started here.

Please welcome our 8th author, Sarah Broadley (aka @sarahpbroadley), a slightly mad Scottish woman who is fiercely loyal and almost always silly. In her words: "I'm a writer who is crazy about her family and all things chocolate. I like listening to the rain at night and watching the world through my wee boys eyes. I currently write rhyming stories for children and have dabbled in the world of crime too, not to mention flesh eating zombies and bad Santas! I hate slush piles and really hope I am not in any.  I'm a sucker for cuddles and anything remotely fluffy and I can't take penicillin as I turn blue and stop breathing...just so you know!" 

Photo by Annalise Nicole

BLOODY SANTA vs ZOMBIE SIREN. Chapter 8 by Sarah Broadley

Laira took a step back and watched her ladies at work. Apparently she had a 'present' awaiting her in her chamber so she meandered slowly to the tower after her appreciation of the carnage had waned in her mind.

Santa was long gone now and the rest of his obedient dwarfs would soon be snared through the power of enchanting Yuletide song. Direct access for all of her ladies to unimaginable elf treasures of the flesh would soon be theirs.

Her stomach lurched in appreciation as it craved more sustenance.

She reached her lair within a few minutes.

She entered the dark void and walked calmly to its centre. With her remaining hand on her left hip and her right foot, so putrid and decayed - to a human the stench would have been atrocious, she firmly placed all her weight on the heaving chest of her latest catch. 

"Now. Where was I?" She said out loud to no one in particular.

She bent over the small trembling body beneath her foot and let the slavers from her mouth gather in a pointed globule directly above her prey's eyes.  She smirked and watched as the horror began to unfold in its pathetic eyes. 

Why did he keep struggling? He was older than the others that had crossed her path today, presents from her ever dutiful girls.

There was something different about this elf, though, she couldn't put her finger on it. She was vaguely impressed that he was still trying to get away from her as she flaunted her decaying body in his line of vision and danced for him. 

Mocking her prized elf, she sang to him one last time and watched with glee as he slowly relaxed and angled his body to meet hers, tears streaming down his once petrified face. She knew the euphoric sound of her voice was in his head and as she watched the saltwater flow down what was left of his face, she instigated the final encore.

The haunting music filled the small cave for a while longer. Once she stopped singing, it wasn't long before his mind came back to him with a judder and he was reminded of his present predicament. She welcomed his child-like scream with open arms as he shrieked violently and his mangled body succumbed to the inevitable blackness that was about to envelope him like the night sky.

The smell of urine that had escaped from her guest was threatening her desire to complete her 'meal'. She couldn't wait to devour the rest of the bright red flesh that sat so tantalisingly angelic around his dwarf-sized bones. The elf passed out for one last time.

Charming, Laira thought to herself, the undead get no respect.

The elf's limp body was of no use to her now, she secretly preferred it when they fought back. That prick Santa should have had this one all to himself if he hadn't succumbed earlier. He could maybe  have used him for one of those abhorrent reindeer games he insisted on playing with his out-of favour workers. She knew that the 'Red Goblin' had finally been brought to his knees. Now it was time for his fucking elves to feel the wrath.

The sharp sound of metal clanging on the floor halted the thoughts flying through her head.  Among the carnage of bodily fluids beneath her feet she saw a small golden circle linked to a chain. Picking up the necklace, she swept her broken fingers across the initials that appeared before her: 'S.L.H' engraved on one side and Edwin - 1 on the other side.

Quickly she deciphered what the letters meant: Santa's Little Helper. Not any more. you're not, Edwin – 1, she thought to herself.

A disturbing thought crossed her mind – why had Santa not cloned this elf? Her thoughts were interrupted as she heard a groan coming from the mutilated elf at the far side of the room.

P.S.: This is 8th Chapter of BLOODY SANTA vs ZOMBIE SIREN. Here are links to previous Chapters: Chapter 1,Chapter 2Chapter 3Chapter 4Chapter 5, Chapter 6, and Chapter 7.

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BLOODY SANTA vs ZOMBIE SIREN. Chapter 7.

by Ksenia Anske


3 Chapters left to publish! Let's continue our chain story. Read about how it started here.

Please welcome our 7th author, Ilka Kasten Hidalgo (aka @ikhidalgo), in her own words, a "3 point virgin - virgin tweep, virgin blogger, virgin writer. In the last 2 weeks my cherry has been popped in all three categories. With your help I can only get better - please comment and give me feedback."

Photo by Raymond

BLOODY SANTA vs ZOMBIE SIREN. Chapter 7 by Ilka Kasten Hidalgo 

Laira’s mouth bubbled in anticipation as they led Santa into their cave. She could feel her partners' – or what was left of them – excitement rise as the darkness of the cave enveloped them. Too long have they gone on with prey that didn’t have the thick taste of warm blood to feast on, and this one in particular had blood rushing to their favorite body part to sink their teeth into. But despite their ravenous appetite, this entrée had been planned far in advance and the taste became only more delectable as the flavors mixed with revenge.

As they encircled Santa, his breath become short and quick from controlling his urge to rip off the remaining tatters that covered their curvaceous cold bodies. Laira dropped down to her knees and began to slowly tear his leather pants with her claw. Santa involuntarily closed his eyes as the sound of the tearing and his hardened breathing filled the cave. Too long has he allowed anyone to take control and for some reason he couldn’t explain he wanted them to have their way with him.

The others followed Laira’s lead and began to slowly tear his armor down with their claws, controlling their own urge to rip his body to shreds. Laira was the first to let the noise of pleasure out, and the reaction she received was well what she hoped. Her girls allowed themselves to moan as piece by piece the armor dropped to the floor. Despite the frigid cold in the cave, Claus did not even shiver as his blood boiled and his member ached for a release.

With his armor off, he stood naked like an overgrown gnome. They stood to encircle him again and began to sway and they sang softly:

            Come, come, come to us sailor

            Come warm our cold beds

            Steal, steal, steal kisses oh lover

            Steal life from your heads

            Flow, flow, flow blood in abounding

            Flow the ocean to find me

            Death, death, death without fighting

            Death will take your last breath free

At the end of their song, the circle had enclosed tightly around Claus, the cold touch of their skin on his body caused a throbbing in both his heads and the release was almost too close to control. His eyes were still closed when he felt a sharp pain his left shoulder. He smiled as the feel of cold lips surrounded it.

So it was going to be this kind of night.

He felt another on his chest, this one deep. He started to open his eyes but the darkness was thick, nothing to focus on. Another one on his right bicep, he started to feel the muscles being torn out.

“Whhha?” Dazed words came from his mouth. He opened his eyes wider to catch his surroundings, shaking his head to clear the dizziness.

“Fuck me,” He let out as he watched them with the chunks of his flesh falling from their mouths and licking the hot blood with their tongues knowing that they were only getting started.

P.S.: This is 7th Chapter of BLOODY SANTA vs ZOMBIE SIREN. Here are links to previous Chapters: Chapter 1,Chapter 2Chapter 3Chapter 4, Chapter 5, and Chapter 6.

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BLOODY SANTA vs ZOMBIE SIREN. Chapter 6.

by Ksenia Anske


We continue our chain story. Read about how it started here.

Please welcome our 6th author, Franziska Dirnberger (aka @agirlmadasbird), a poet at heart who sometimes dips her toe into writing stories. She is currently obsessed with Dylan Thomas, loves the smell of a new book, is interested in life's difficulties and sometimes starts singing and dancing in the streets for no particular reason.

Photo by Helen Warner

BLOODY SANTA vs ZOMBIE SIREN. Chapter 6 by Franziska Dirnberger

Back in the olden days a rumor, widely spoken about, had filled Kaffeeklubben Island. When Edwin and all the first-born elves were still alive, a tale was whispered of beautiful women drowning entire armadas by luring them into a seductive net of soft melodies.

One of them was Laira, an elder amongst the emancipated tribe of the ladies of the water. Her slender figure, black hair and piercing blue eyes had led countless strangers into termination. They were so oblivious to the approaching of their end, that not until acute teeth sunk into arteries, fate dawned on them. Countless eyes filled with terror had gazed at Laira while her heart had widened with excitement. But on the eve of the centennially nomination of a new Santa everything as she knew it changed.

For hundreds of years the Sirens had lived in coexistence with the elves and Santa. Until this one particular nomination day, this impertinence, this human stepped onto Kaffeeklubben Island and claimed his right to the throne of Arctica. Santa Claus the Redeemer, as he called himself, slayed the unprepared Council of retired gift bringers and announced a new era of Christmasy Traditions. The bloody battle fought to prevent this wrongful uprising  left the Kaffeeklubben Siren tribe defeated and smaller in numbers. Upon the dawning of his victory, the new Santa Claus raised his theatric dooming voice and cast a curse:

“No one will ever see you as flesh and blood, you will be damned to live a life as ghastly antics, only the sun will reveal your awful faces. Not dead, nor alive your figures get frozen. As beautiful ghostly creatures you will walk the land by night, haunted by a craving for mammal flesh.“  This was before the steriliziation started and Santa degenerated to a clumsy sack of curse words.

The aftermath of the bane had severely devitalized the Siren tribe of Kaffeeklubben Island. Driven by their urge for meat, neither elves nor baby reindeer were safe from their sharp claws.

Before, hunting had been a dance of pleasure and pain, equally arising as the season of the tides. After Santa’s brutal strike the Sirens collapsed in a cloud of desperate preying on the weak and least tasteful members of the food chain, cloned elves, first generation.

Sometimes Laira would keep one of the elves alive for interrogation, but their numbly brains only revealed fractures of Santa’s growing dictatorship. The fictional numbers of weapons and H&K USP what-nots were no reason for not eventually drowning them.

So much time has passed since the unspeakable had happened that almost everybody had forgotten about the very existence of the once so beautiful women.

Laira’s heart ached of the mere memory of it. Since then, her tribe has gathered strength and power. Now it was time to act, to reclaim back their rightful territory and teach that bastard of a Santa a lesson.

Pacing up and down the hallway of her cold, dark chamber, she felt this urge again. Her eyes darkened at the smell of pulsing blood.

P.S.: This is 6th Chapter of BLOODY SANTA vs ZOMBIE SIREN. Here are links to previous Chapters: Chapter 1,Chapter 2Chapter 3, Chapter 4, and Chapter 5.

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